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adddictions2010-06-20 07:06 pm
eschatologist.livejournal.com) wrote in adddictions2010-06-20 07:06 pm
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So, as I was mentioning on plurk - I'm something of a psychology nerd and love pondering over how precisely the thought processes of another works/operates/etc. Thus, I pose this question:
How do(es) your character(s) think?
Do they think in color, words, action, movement, music, movies - the entirety of their senses?
Draw it, diagram it, describe it - either way you choose, inquiring minds want to know. ♥
Do they think in color, words, action, movement, music, movies - the entirety of their senses?
Draw it, diagram it, describe it - either way you choose, inquiring minds want to know. ♥
/noms psychology with you (^3^)
The Ego, which reins in the more powerful Id very much like a rider would guide, or restrain a cataphract ( Draft horse in full plate armor ) in battle = Ichigo. Then the Super Ego which is partially detached from the Id, and Ego tethered to the consciousness from high above provides logic, and calm perspective = Zangetsu ( Ichigo's sword ).
|Db
Now, as far as Ichigo thinks on his own; I see him as a very kinetic-minded person. He's a freaking genius in battle, after all. He's able to read, and anticipate an opponents moves after a while of seeing them fight. However, he balances that battle-genius with being pretty idiotic otherwise. He's brash, and impulsive, and while he has random, startlingly accurate bursts of insight into his friends, for the most part he's dumb as a post when it comes to more subtle matters of the heart.
I think the reason for this is because his mental process is like a jumble of sounds, sights, movement, and memory all mixed up together. It's frenetic, with no knowing what piece of thought, or instinct will surface at a given time. Because of this quicksilver facility, Ichigo makes an excellent student. He's stubborn enough to give up free time in order to study, and learn.
As he progresses through the Bleach series, Ichigo also does a fair amount of growing up in a short amount of time. He goes from being a petulant kid, still grieving for his mother, and holding the whole world at an arm's length, to finding his own sense of purpose, accepting a huge amount of responsibility, and making some extremely important friends along the way.
In fact, Ichigo's whole focus shifts during the storyline from child-like self-centered views ( though not selfish, just immature ) to being ridiculously selfless. It's interesting to watch, to me, and even more fun to speculate on how such a person - with so much power, and no desire to use it for anything save protecting his loved ones - would think, and react. How he would balance a life, and his responsibilities, etc.
...okay, enough rambling, since I got OT, there >3>;
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On the one hand, Akira is a werewolf. In his canon, a totally separate species from mankind. They can't pass it on to humans, and they're largely extinct, due to unknown reasons. All he really has is theories, since werewolves aren't supposed to exist. He's had to make educated guesses on how his people MIGHT have lived, since he's had no guidance. His mother was a pure-blooded werewolf, and she's the parent he identifies most with. He lost her in his youth, though, along with his father. He often looks down on humanity, not because they're weaker in body than him, but for their weakness of spirit. Werewolves have a "noble savage" mentality that reverse nature and sees mankind as greedy, self-serving, and ultimate destructive to everything around them. A virulent species whose only real strength is brutal cunning and the ability to breed rapidly.
On the other hand, he inherited a human outlook from his father. He was a good man, from how Akira talks about him, but not as close to him as his mother. Despite his feelings on humans, he finds himself drawn to them socially. Always watching from afar, a part of him wanting to be in with them. With no werewolves left, to his knowledge, there's no other choices. He's often tried to run away from humans entirely, only to find himself coming right back again. That side knows that as bad as humans can be, they also have a strong sense of duty and bonds with their families, and when they rise above their own egos, they can do great things.
These two allow him to get a wide, sometimes confusing perspective on the world. He dislikes most of what he sees in modern society, but finds himself drawn to it, and sees those same traits in himself.
As for how he sees the word from a biological standpoint, his senses are much better than a human's. He absorbs much more sensory input at a more rapid rate, and his brain has the processing speed to cope with it. That same trait is what helps him excel academically, even if he's barely trying. Food tastes better, smells are more sharp and distinct, and the world is full of sound. Just by experiencing things, he gains insight into them by experiencing them more fully than a normal person would.
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I feel like I know this username. Have you posted in dressing rooms much?
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If not, still; YAY! /has mad respect for any, and every mun no matter the canon who puts thought, and effort into accurate characterization.
..../flees.
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...Or, on the off chance,
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/snerks. SO HARD.
I kidd, I kidd. It's likely dear_mun, then. ;3
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Though I will say I made this account specifically for DDD, so you wouldn't have seen THIS Akira account before.
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Zuko is, surprise surprise, not given to extended immobile thought. He tends to only lean toward that kind of reminiscing when it's out and out brooding - if he does sit still for a while and start to think, he ends up brooding as a natural byproduct. (rofl) He's much better at quick, snap decisions. He has strong ideas of right and wrong and isn't hesitant to impose them on others, as anyone that's spoken with him in two seconds would realize. Emotions, while prominent in his reasoning, take a back seat to his sense of rightness, honor and justification. It's this exact counterplay that can be seen in his current difficulties on what to do with Azula: since both emotions and his sense of rightness agree that she shouldn't be killed, he rejects that scenario entirely, but beyond that he gets conflicted.
He tends to stick firmly to any decisions he's "certain" of, and all the rest plunge him into rather unnecessary turmoil and self-doubt. He's a classic example of dragging yourself down with unrelated concerns and getting lost in your own head.
Rei, on the other hand, is nearly incoherent and indescribable in her decision making. Her emotions, while not entirely ignored, are completely foreign to her. She never knows what to make of them and dwells on them frequently, not quite troubled but certainly unbalanced by them. The series itself mentions her instability several times, particularly in reference to her inability to control Unit-00 (though I have my own separate theories on contributing factors there aside from Rei's mental turmoil). These emotions are a backdrop or undercurrent to the lightning-fast and unflinching clockwork of logic. In general, Rei has a lot going on beneath the surface that she is completely unable to articulate, even to herself.
And I'll do the other two later idk.
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Now, Denzel can think logical; however, logic does not apply in this universe, so therefore he tends to think more illogical. Again, idealistic and practical, he’s the middle ground of science and magic. Which is what he does. So, middle thinker. But it does tend to flop more to the illogical side, since magic can make the logical, illogical. Hence, he does not deny 2 + 2 =4. He just finds it a waste of time, knowing Fairies could make; 2 +2 = Fish if they wanted too because in all reality,
Who WOULD CARE, if 2+2 =4 when that kind of magic exists and you're 110 % sure that magic does.
So he's rather open minded to strange things happening then most people in his universe, outside of the Fairies that are causing this and thinks outside the box.
He ticks, when he's reacting to something that pushes to him to the edge of his insanity. Start chewing on pencils or eye twitching. In other words, he doesn't hold back on his emotions. You make him cry, he'll cry. You make him angry. He's angry. Etc, etc. You know not having denial ~
Which would make him so much healthier menality if he had denial, and actually he would be able to focus better as well, and drop the fucking Fairies and be like the rest of the people in that universe when they see a flying magic carpet with a face and say, it's not a Fairy or caused by magic and be less deranged.
Yeah, that flying carpet pretty much is the work of those Fairies, most likey is even one.
/ Might do another later
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He's the type who would go to save a princess from a tower only to decide he'd rather take over the tower and keep the princess in there as a trophy, and maybe hang out with the guards getting shit-faced if he liked their spirit enough. And then the guards would try to gangbang the princess and he'd get pissed and try to crush them all, have blown his heroic role with the princess when kidnapping her himself, and thus end up with nothing for the entire venture.
1/IDEFK
I. The Messenger:
Concerning his Angelic origins, Kaworu's thought processes here are dramatically different from those he uses most commonly. In comparison to his usual empathy, his calculated logic, and dynamic-flicker-fast analytical processes, Kaworu's thoughts here are slowed and contained to the often times simultaneous transfer of knowledge through a wordless system of language. According to my personal logical deduction that it is more a "resonance" (AKA: musica universalis) on a telepathic level and the commonly accepted idea that Angels are rather Borgian in their passing of learned concepts/experiences - Kaworu's thoughts in this state mirror that of a musical movement or symphony. However, since this language is only comprised of this kind of movement and no written/spoken dialogue whatsoever, this information travels in kind of almost musical transfer of images/feelings/etc. - in other words, think of it as deeply tangible reverberation. A kind of familiar and unfamiliar tape placed on fast-forward, though you're living in the moment and the minute of it. All sensations, tastes, and sounds are communicated - though blurred by the ultimate funneling and transferring from one to another to another to another. A white noise at times, he didn't have the option to turn off this thought process entirely while his siblings were on the prowl. Any kind of personal ideals and so on and so forth were shared with the ultimate collective of those born of Adam - and Kaworu was no exception.
To cope with the flurry (or slowing) of this particular transfer of ideas and so on - Kaworu learned to filter it enough to allow himself concentration when training under SEELE. This thought process is natural and base - almost raw and utterly visceral in it's manner of working. There is nothing quite like this that rests in Kaworu now, but the fragments of how it had once operated still linger on. As long as his soul continues to possess his body, this ability and the shared yearning never disappear entirely. This is instinctual and gritty, though simultaneously beautiful in it's working. In other words, a perfectly good place to start this harsh contrast of thought processes all contained in this one boy's head.
2/??
While the same individual, these two are immensely polar in some of their operations. The key difference lies in their current placement, needs, influences, and motivations. To look first at the Kaworu who is Tabris:
Drawn by Adam, his motivations are solely self-serving. While tied to and aware of the very short leash in which SEELE has him on - his interest in humans is much more detached. Indifferent. His interest is simple and clean-cut observation, usually. What makes him pass as human is enough to use, and these feelings are attempted to be ignored though they are "replicated" within himself. Knowing his placement and his position, he's startling quick to provide a harsh analysis of the individual who stands in his path - though, perhaps only in his head. He fiercely guards the one who is himself who is part of SEELE - as this is a requirement needed in order to fulfill his mission. A slip could reveal the reality of his position, much more what and who he actually is. Unlike the Kaworu who is Kaworu, his detachment from humanity is not one made by merely the recognition of different operations/physical matters alone - but one that he wants to maintain instinctively, literally, and genetically distanced from. Despite his interest in them, this is immensely secondary to what he is and was sent to do. He's very gently manipulative and deceptive, and his thoughts tend to be sharp and angled. There are always biases in this kind of process, and in this one his ability to mirror and speak on the more positive qualities that the other is seeking comes through most clearly as he very easily and readily processes what little or is generously offered to him. He doesn't "waste" as much time dwelling on the emotional aspect of others beyond what is merely causal or advancing in terms of his motivations. His own emotions, as well, are clean out of the picture. There's a deep undercurrent of thoughts trained by regiment and schedule - and for it, his processes here a like well-oiled machine. It leaves very little space for "unnecessary" detail, but what "unnecessary" detail exists holds a deeper importance. For example - his interest in music and the lingering idea that all men do not have an immediate propensity for evil, despite what he had likely been told.
He's trained to be strategist and an observer. And for it, his ability to quickly assess a situation, take in and use what little information that has been provided to him, and his problem-solving skills are rather astounding. This is the same in "both", though it comes in mostly clearly through Tabris as he has better "field" in which to show his expertise on. Think of it as a lightning quick, extremely detailed explanation provided and laid out by the brain - and there you have the Kaworu who is Tabris' thought process. In essence, this is the boy that SEELE desired him to be. Unrelentingly logical, almost frightening linear in that it searches out the best route in which to answer standing questions - whether or not the solution is abstract, but at the same time - fraying into something almost creative in terms of his quick thinking, his ease in deception, and his ability to spin lies and appearances at an eyeblink. The perfect puppet.
Notably, while the Kaworu who is Tabris and the Kaworu who is Kaworu share a great deal of their processes, their interests vary by time, distance, and separation. Even now, the overlap is only an overlap in the barest of motivational senses - here, notably, I'm dividing them by the ideals of another or others. Tabris is the ideal of SEELE, while Kaworu possesses multiple characteristics that SEELE would have hated from the outset - or, rather, would have known that it indicated their eventual failure.
3/??
The Kaworu who is Kaworu does not shut away his empathy when it is not useful to him. Given time and space and air to breathe, it is implemented out of something out of pure curiosity, interest, and (now) concern. Despite the deeply logical and "other-emotional" notes that dominates him - there is something oddly childish about this thirsting for further knowledge. Now that he is not saddled with a mission, even though this causes within him a great sense of uprootedness, his thought process mirrors that of a Jacob's Ladder. If you think of the actual implement/toy, it has a great amount of flexibility and motion - and trickles both up and down in terms of either. It has a very wide and abstracted and linear range. However, it also has the ability to stretch itself thinner or become immensely dense. The Kaworu who is Kaworu is aptly matched to this, granted that due to his lack of a leash - he's able to employ his ability to observe and discern in any fashion he pleases. His thoughts, as mentioned before because he is no longer chained, are comprised of often times immensely abstracted musings that jump quickly from place to place, subject to subject, conclusion to possible conclusion. His analysis of people is more based on his wanting to understand them, rather than his need to understand them - as said before, that was his mission: to essentially blend in long enough to play a human to fulfill what he was sent to do.
Here, he's intensely philosophical, analytical, but also carries an undercurrent and over-current of understanding for humanity and (sometimes) their emotions. Because he's always on the opposite shore, more so than any other human, his simultaneously attached and detached perspective allows for an understanding of life/actions/needs of others/man that man can only dream of achieving without becoming clouded with personal biases and prejudices. His understanding is so deep, occasionally, that he's able to actually tolerate so much more than most people would even permit - likely because they would not be able to remove the block that is their own emotions. However, this is also dangerous because he does occasionally set himself up for martyrdom (he does have a complex!) which others around him tend not to like. If at all. Really, his thought process here on man is intensely detailed that leads into the broad scope, or intensely broad that leads into the detailed scope. For all of his observation and mental quickness, he's a stellar student and his open mindedness allows him to acquire most new concepts with absolute ease or with relatively little effort. His drive to learn and to know all that is beyond himself is kind of what keeps his thoughts so absolutely abstracted and linear all at once.
It should be also said that because of his musical influences, his thoughts here also carry a current of a kind of organized and disorganized symphony. Like all parts of Kaworu, despite his immensely contradictory nature - it still manages to produce an individual who is serene, calm, and otherwise very well-put together on almost all occasions on the surface.
Still waters run deep is pretty much meant to define this boy, in essence.
4/??
The Kaworu that is Kaworu shines here, in particular. His personal interest, his investment in humanity, and his understandings and personal comprehension of individual and shared difficulty causes his thoughts here to be of the most flexible and detailed, but simultaneously of the most idealistic. The Jacob's Ladder aspect plays here in a very peculiar manner, granted that his observations are both trained and inborn - and his curiosity is very much natural. Looking to how he analyzes the other or others and the world around them/him - his thoughts are at once going from detailed to extremely broad, or broad to extremely detailed. Depending on the situation at hand, say, the emotional situation of a cared for individual - the broadness tends to vary. However, if he touches upon individual loneliness, say, he takes this universal concept and it trickles down into the minutest of details. This intense awareness of the emotions and aspects of the other, despite being unable to pinpoint some entirely, really leads into the very electric, raw, and logical viewpoint that's often taken in the writing I apply to him. Strangely enough, really. His musings tend to be extremely metaphysical on the occasion, despite having the physical source in front of him. His sensory abilities and his mental dexterity here enables him to worm through loops of intense emotion and apply and remove factors that relate to what he's attempting to sort out or understand/use/soothe/etc. in a way that he can manage. Since he is not human and never will be, these processes occasionally take longer than most would think - but, this is also true that he's able to rifle through these kind of thoughts at a pace that defies most usual comprehension, granted this is all very instilled, influenced, and inborn. This was what he was designed to do, and this is what he does of his own volition. Thus, his practice here is more of an art.
However, strangely, these thoughts are not merely contained to what most would probably think were words. No, these are contained to something that's a little more base than that. Despite his logical core, his empathy permits him to filter through these understandings, these insights, and these emotions (occasionally) like they were colors on a canvas or keywords in a sentence. He feels (though the intensity is minimal unless it is for some reason amped up) and perceives. So, not only are these musings lightning fast (usually) - but they're also marked with the physicality of external emotion, etc. Sometimes extremely abstract, I tend to like to compare it to the ebb and flow of a tide. It starts from one source, but it spreads - and thus that's also why the Jacob's Ladder imagery works so well. It's kind of so flexible that it permits a circular thought pattern to arise without him ever getting permanently stuck or fixed within it.
However, I must again remind that this boy isn't human. His observations and his acquired insights are often without bias and very rarely colored with judgment. There is no immediate slant one way or the other - nor is there usually even afterward. He does not attempt to twist these learned details in any way that would benefit him or satisfy him. Unfortunately, this lack of judgment also leads to curious "faults" in his mental patterns, which in turn leads to a deluge of other questions relating to the inability to occasionally discern all the reasons for these motivations/etc. outside of a vague and unclear answer he's able to provide based on logical assumption and similar emotional patterns previously observed in other individuals. So, on the occasion he is prone to thinking much more widely than necessary or much more deeply than required. Sometimes the answer misses him entirely, though this is usually due to his own personal inability to understand his emotions entirely, much less with ease or because there are various concepts/ideas/etc. he does not commonly think on/has not learned due to his intense isolation and inhuman nature. Even so, this thought process is ultimately comprised of lightning quick jumps, intense analysis, and a kind of triggered base/springboard, etc.
5/??
6/7? h-hopefully
Due to his training, his directions, and his never quite being able to cross the barrier that separates Angel from man - this method of thought is by far the most inconsistent, time-consuming, and stuttered. Like and unlike Rei, Kaworu is sent occasionally internally tripping over his emotions. What hurts him, what pains him, what he needs or wants or desires - most of this is suppressed or heavily chained down. Trained to acknowledge the emotions of others above his own, and having to learn these emotions/feel these emotions at all has permanently crippled this method of thought from ever operating in a way that could be considered normal. Touching back on the Jacob's Ladder comparison, this is very much like the block that continually wedges itself between the space that separates the other two. Like an inexperienced individual attempting to learn the trick, it occasionally unravels at an uncontrolled pace, or in a fashion that forbids scrutiny/movement out of an utter inability to grasp at the concept as he is, now. This is a very delicate thought process. One that is simultaneously treated with the utmost carefulness and the roughest of hands. Like a child playing with a very fragile specimen, this is what this thought process looks like - for every insight gained, there is frustration and difficulty that must precede it. For it, Kaworu is very limited to very few spots he can do this. While there are no exterior emotions that show up on his face when contemplating his own emotions and his own self - a self he was designed not to be talked about - he needs to do this in a quiet area with relatively little disruption. The shower and the bed are the best places to perform this series of analysis. Permitted to remain still and with little external "sound", he's able to pick apart what it was he might have felt and may be continuing to feel. Though most emotional subtleties and mixes are still beyond his comprehension, he's able to identify quite a few that are known within himself after some searching. On most occasions, his emotions are considered something of a stumbling point, for him. While he's usually quite graceful with how he hides them, occasionally they'll stumble out verbally (see: his conversation in the baths with Shinji) - which is more-or-less a result of the inability to deal with such a strong, impulsive emotion or an emotion that is deemed necessary to express for some manner or another (which, in essence, makes him appear to be childlike and embarrassingly earnest, on the occasion).
However, what further compounds the difficulty of pondering over the self is the lack of personal willingness to voice emotions due partially to his training and due partially to his need to treat his observations with a kind of particular care. This sort of carefulness was called for also in his training, but because of this he doesn't know how to fully explore these emotions in a way that would be considered normal - nor does he really desire to. His general personality of introverted feeling and his intense privacy on himself is ingrained, natural, and instilled. Adding further the foreign nature of human emotion, though he fits much more readily into the shell of mankind than Rei does, it still stands that his emotions and his personal introspection causes a great deal of surprises, on the occasion.
Even regardless of his difficulties, he is able to feel attachment in a way that is solid and emotional - though, not necessarily in a way that signals "desire" in the conventional sense. Love is not beyond his grasp, and he does not love many - those he does is no secret. He's quite neutral to almost everyone else, after all. It isn't to say he doesn't feel, he does, but those emotions that require digging or are painful are not emotions he likes to really figure out (at least around people, lmfao). He basically just doesn't like to voice them, unless he deems it necessary or wanted (-which want is something he struggles with, occasionally. He wasn't designed to want or need outside of Adam, after all).
7/7 SUCCESS \o/
Thus, TL;DR:
Kaworu, despite being a social failure, manages to make this chaos in his head work in a manner that is ultimately beautifully orchestrated. Usually. ♥