An old favorite.

[halfthetrouble]

It's been a very long time since we've done this one, I think, so have at it!

I ___ YOU!

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Comments

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Nothing at all? You might be able to stifle all of your needs, but I'm only human. I can promise I won't do anything that would compromise your anal virginity. See, I can do boundaries.

It's not all-important, I'm just curious, and I have good instincts.

[material_guy]

Yer tellin' me you can't go 24 hours without getting off.

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Well...that might depend on what kind of mood I'm in, and who says it'd be 24 hours, what if it's a week or more...or indefinitely? You can't expect me to go that long.

[material_guy]

Hadn't thought of that...

Nnnnn... Well, in that case, I---But the scenario calls for a day! If it's anything longer than that, the only experimenting should be findin' a way to fix it before I tank yer career!

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Who said the scenario calls for a day, we're being hypothetical. It could be one of those viruses that last for two or more days. That is a good point, though, I'd have to teach you how to be a passable me. I can do some work from home though.

[material_guy]

If it's just two to four days, you can hold out, unless lookin' at me-yerself makes you that hot.

But are you sure you want me out there pretendin' to be you? Even if you somehow manage to not piss me off so that I wouldn't use it as a chance to get back at you for somethin', I'm not an actor. As for me, my place can probably run just fine for a week or more as long as I can still contact someone to give orders, so, we don't gotta worry about you and your little pacifist thing bringing the house down...

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

You have to be joking, one day sure...two or four...you're asking a bit much babe.

Well if your place can run fine without you for a few days we'd still have to go to my place. I'd have to take leave, so really you wouldn't be doing too much acting. After that it would be alright to go back...but...hey, this isn't really happening.

[material_guy]

I can see four startin' to get on the long side, but you can't manage for two or three? It'll take at least that long for me to figure out if it's weirder if I let you-me top myself off or if I-you do it for me-you.

And you at my place looking like me would just get you-me in trouble. It's normally an active place, you know. They're used to weird shit, but I don't want them getting used to taking orders from you, even as me. Or would it be me as you? Or... No, either way, that'd be a problem...

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Ah...well I was thinking more along the lines of a hand-job than doing anything which is something that even I find a little on the disturbing side. If it gets too bad I'll just call a few friends and that'll be that.

Well then, it's settled, we'd just have to rough it in my world...though it's not exactly as though you'd be roughing it.

[material_guy]

So it's decided. If I'm ever you, I'll spend the day at yer place in that Germany place of yours and keep myself entertained with the "famous" beer and sausage you mentioned and won't ruin your image, and you'll keep from tryin' to see how many marks you can leave on yourself-myself, and won't give me more hand jobs than absolutely necessary.

...Y'know, some how I don't feel like I actually decided on anything important with all this, besides that yer weird. Really fuckin' weird.

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Germany? You know, that's an excellent idea. If by some disastrous freak accident something like this should happen I think it would be a good idea to fly to Germany. Anyway, if something like that happened I'd do my best not to mark you up too bad, I can't make any promises about hand jobs.

Yeah...I'm weird.

[material_guy]

You sure about that? I get the feeling you'd actually do yer best to mark me up just to see if you could do it.

But if you understand that yer weird now, that's a step in the right direction. So this wasn't all for nothing.

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

Now I'm getting mixed signals...do you want me to mark you up Herr? I have a vacuum with dual cyclone suction that generates over 300 air watts! I'm not afraid to use it.

At least I'm healthy, that's all that really matters.

[material_guy]

Firing off the specs of your vacuum cleaner like it's your favorite handgun is weird even for you.

Let's see if I cant make this signal a little clearer: try it and you won't be able to say you're healthy anymore.

[herrglimmerous.livejournal.com]

I'm very particular when it comes to my cleaning products.

So defensive, I already said I wouldn't do anything beyond your ability to cope with. You keep tempting me to dootherwise...it's your fault, Herr.