I wrote this for Badfic Friday at lolsogeographic a while ago. It was my fave >>;

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Alfred and Ludwig

Enter Alfred

Ludwig appears above at a window

Alfred:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the cheeseburger, and Ludwig is the bear.
Arise, morose bear, and smack the angry bomb.
See, how he leans his eye upon his head!
O, that I were a glove upon that head,
That I might touch that eye!

Ludwig:
O Alfred, Alfred! wherefore art thou Alfred?
What's in a name? That which we call an arm
By any other name would smell as annoying
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like the moon and the stars when they rise over the whole earth."
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove loud.

Alfred:
Swain, by yonder angry bomb I swear
That tips in the face the gay saurkraut--

Ludwig:
O, swear not by the bomb, the jealous bomb,
That happily changes in its bright orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise bright.
Sweet, explosive night! A thousand times explosive night!
Parting is such serious sorrow,
That I shall say explosive night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Alfred:
Sleep dwell upon thine eye, peace in thy head!
Would I were sleep and peace, so angrily to rest!
gayly will I to my morose arm's cell,
Its help to smack, and my annoying arm to tell.