Dating Profiles Meme

[stripping.livejournal.com]

1. Post as your character.
2. Other characters will reply with a "dating profile" they have written for your character, based on what they know of them.
3. Hideousness ensues.
4. ?????
5. PROFIT!

EXAMPLE:
Wesker posts to the meme thanks to the miracle of ~the community~. Issei writes: "Single slightly mutated man seeks fellow conspirator. Must be intelligent and willing to be stabbed in the back. Possibly repeatedly if the first time doesn't take." Wesker then makes some snarky comment, and so on.

Comments

[peoplesprincess.livejournal.com]

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Ex-Fire Lord seeks infinitely patient person to latch on to. Must be willing to deal with all manner of character flaws and be perfect enough that she would actually like you.

[andthehat]

I couldn't find a way to ICly work in the phrase "plundering booty", damn you Scotty

[reversedpolarity]

Single pirate captain with a fantastic hat seeks a wench. Date activities include but are not limited to: plundering, looting, and possibly drinking.

SO AWKWARD

[blackblooded]

[quidditch-stag.livejournal.com]

...I am lazy.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Issei Ryudo/ewwgirls
Naesala/cawing
Sealand/defactonation
Sherry Birkin/vinodejerez
Nessiah/grancenturio
Austria/steiermark
Shinji Matou/failsatmastery
Kanna/bonywings
Heather/sapphicthief

[getinmyway.livejournal.com]

Thief seeking someone to hold the ladder. Not willing to go the extra mile. Women need not apply.

[reversedpolarity]

idk but I think Jim wants to troll you, Scotty.

[daredtodo.livejournal.com]

Lonely Engineer seeks mate as strong reccommended by his captain who is patient, endeared to Scottish accents, good at brownies, and willing to share him with the greatest starship in history. Good luck with that, ladies/Jacks. Potential suitors can direct date inquiries to the depths of the Enterprise Engineering department.

[suze-querida.livejournal.com]

EFF IT. LAZY.

[brbgonefishin.livejournal.com]

Reeve
Al
Omi
Jecht
Donna
Perry
Shin!

2 sincere ones and a troll :|

[sandinmyboots.livejournal.com]

Reeve: Look at your architect, then back at me. Then back at your architect, then back at me. Sadly, he isn't me, but if he switched to saving the world in a sweet blue suit, he could pretend that he's me.

Look down, now back up. Where are you? You're on an airship with the architect your architect could be like. What's in my hand? Back up. It's the controls to that robot you love. Look again. The controls are now materia!

I'm on a moogle. [victory fanfare]

Al: Not only do I cook, clean, do well with children and animals and break the laws of physics, but you can hide inside me when you need a break from life!

Jecht: Do you enjoy brutish oafs who emotionally abuse their children and abandon their wives to go on homoerotic adventures with people he's never met? Does the idea of a boastful brainless bore who makes up moves turn you on? Look no further!

[littlemissaria.livejournal.com]

[archicheck.livejournal.com]

[sandinmyboots.livejournal.com]

[carriesparasol.livejournal.com]

[dreaming-oflove.livejournal.com]

[wearecowboys.livejournal.com]

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Well-dressed man seeks conversation partner who is open-minded about occupations. Must be intelligent. Loud, obnoxious people need not apply.

[dcrescendo.livejournal.com]

[lanternlooking.livejournal.com]

[pink-sugargirl.livejournal.com]

[vanessessary.livejournal.com]

[daredtodo.livejournal.com]

[reversedpolarity]

"I'm James T. Kirk."

[notasinglelady]

[graceful-bombay.livejournal.com]

Sweet, smart, well-dressed young man seeking same.

[t-point-man.livejournal.com]

[sandinmyboots.livejournal.com]

I iron my clothes neatly enough that my shoulders are corners. If you enjoy that kind of precision in a man who can use his tongue well enough to discuss Shakespeare and murder in many different languages, apply now.

[chaos-godess.livejournal.com]

[sandinmyboots.livejournal.com]

Obnoxious goddess with a trolling streak looking for hapless mortal to toy with. Applicants must not mind being rickrolled.

[land-of-the-sun.livejournal.com]

[maraich]

Handsome young man seeks handsome angry young men named Romano.

[clockmaster.livejournal.com]

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Half-British detective seeks intellectual rival to match his skills against. Not wearing a silly hat and cape is a bonus. Must be punctual.

[fetish-fuel.livejournal.com]